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Writer's pictureConnie Mason Michaelis

The Tallk

Excerpt from Daily Cures, Wisdom for Healthy Aging by Connie Mason Michaelis





The dreaded talk---the one you remember as a preteen when your parents blindsided you with the embarrassing sex education talk. The talk where you had nothing to say but, “OK, I got it, could we go watch TV now.”  And then there came a time in life when you were the parent. Perhaps you and your spouse had a debate about who should do it, even an argument. The problem is you don’t get a lot of practice on this topic.  My mother, bless her heart, handed me a manila envelope with a physician’s brochure, and told me if I had any questions I should ask her. Believe me, I was not about to have any questions!  If you could select the most awkward moments in life, the dreaded talk might make the list. It is a pinnacle point of vulnerability for both parent and child. It is as naked as you can get with your clothes on!


There is another dreaded talk that happens at the opposite end of life, or it should happen. It is when the kids talk to their parents about end-of-life planning. It sounds so ominous, but this is as necessary as knowing about the birds and bees. Avoiding these candid conversations can lead to disaster. Questions about living arrangements, downsizing, living wills, powers of attorney, funeral plans, et al. are critical.  The healthiest individuals plan for the future; prepare for as many scenarios as possible, then proceed to live life to its fullest. This conversation may have as many vulnerabilities as the sex talk. It delves into areas that are awkward and sensitive. The conversation may be initiated by the kids, or it may be that the parents want to share their plans with the kids. Either way, it may be awkward. Go ahead and have the talk!

"The only sex education my mother ever gave me was the injunction: 'Never let a boy touch you down there.' She seemed to be referring to my knees." Jeanette Winterson

 

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